the friends thing

Recently, I wrote a short story (that granted, was by no means short) about friends, and the type of love between them. I don't really know if I believe it. I mean, I did, but now.... I just don't know. I say that a lot, I need to come up with something else.
Last night, I went to a movie. The Protocols of Zion. It was interesting. But, it was also weird. I went with Ryan. And I thought, hey I can do this. I can be his friend. This is good. But then, during the movie, I (it wasn't a romantic movie. Far from it--documentary) I just fell again is the best way to put it. Except this time, it was more comfortable, not so jumpy or squirmy. Had I been close enough, I would have put my head on his shoulder. Why didn't I? Because I refuse to read into things. He doesn't like me, at least, not in the same way that I like him.
but anyway this is silly. look at me going on like this. stupid valentine's day.

my grandma has alzheimer's.