think happy thoughts peter pan

the play peter pan is often not considered an artwork because it engages the audience in the dialogue when peter asks the audience if they believe in fairies. so exclusive don't you think? sometimes i feel just as ridiculed. one stupid thing. one little rule. thats all it takes to keep you from bonding with new people.

this weekend i went on a retreat that i was really looking forward to. it was a blast, well inasmuch as i finally got to bond with my wall-mate. but as far as participating in the events goes, i dont know, its kind of like, talking about your favorite plays as a group, and before you even get to say that you love peter pan, someone makes the adamant statement that peter pan is not art and that because of this, it is a horrible play.

i guess thats the way i feel when people state how horrible catholics are, right in front of me. well i guess people think im protestant because im white, but you know what? they can go fuck themselves, seriously. im sick of being thought of as less of a person because i am catholic. im sick of being told i need to accept christ into my life and be saved, when i have found all i need from my own faith. never have i felt so convicted as when i am exploring my religion and looking at the reasons we do the things we do, and the ways in which we do them. it gives me more insight into what god could be like. so who the fuck are they to tell me i am wrong, and i am not enough of a believer?

whew, i didnt know the anger was still in me. apparently its always there. i mean honestly, faith and reason work together. i really enjoyed the speaker though, i really thought she looked into things. and her analogies showed how much she really thought about what she was speaking of, because it wasnt a practiced lecture, it was her telling her story, using something she's passionate about to get her point across.

i just really wish, life weren't so complicated. in an ideal world, i could confide in my friends, in an ideal world, people would like me and appreciate me for who i am. people would listen. they'd be willing to look inside themselves and ask, is it possible that im the one thats wrong? ive been asking myself that question my entire life. its no fun at all.

and in a perfect world, i wouldn't dread going to my classes. i would love each and every one of them and not want to spend all my time sleeping so as to avoid all the people i don't want to encounter or deal with. i would have engery, and wouldn't be plagued by constant headaches.

but this isnt a perfect world is it? you do what you can and hope you get by. but there is still hope. because even though to some critics, peter pan is not art, look at how successful and inspiring it has become.

think happy thoughts peter pan
think happy thoughts and soon you will be able to fly